There was a time in my life where I was a complainer. If there was anything to complain about I would find it. Give me a million dollars and I’d complain about having to pay taxes. But how often does complaining about something solve our problems? Rarely. Usually it puts people off, drives those close to us away, and in effect isolates those who probably could use an extra friend or two.
Everyone needs to vent now and again but according to Physiology Today Excess Complaining can rewire your brain towards negativity. In effect making you not just a complainer but a negative personal! It can increase stress levels which can effect your physical health like blood pressure and weight gain as well.
So how did I learn to stop complaining?
1. Do something about it. BEFORE I verbalize my complaint I ask myself is there something I could have done or could do about this. If its within my control to change it then instead of complaining I take action. Because I’m all about efficiency. Why waste time talking about it when I can do something about it.
2. Remember the 3 P’s: Positive, Productive, and Prudent. If its not positive in my life, productive for me to do, or acting with prudence or care for my future then I don’t have time for it. Lifes short. Make the most with the time you have here to maximize your joy and keep it moving.
3. Give it up to a higher power. Proverbs 18:21 says that words have the power of life or death in them. What we speak really does matter. Is what your about to speak worth damaging your relationship with God over? If you constantly complain are you telling yourself you lived a blessed life and are truly living with gratitude?
4. Write it down. Journals help me get the thoughts out of my head in an organized and reflective way. Often times I realize I’m making a mountain out of a mole hill in the grand scheme of things. Reflecting on a situation and taking a more birds eye overview approach can really help me put things back into perspective.
5. Look for the positives. Always always ALWAYS look for the positives. It can be hard but trust me they can be found. I made myself rewire my brain to look for the positives in every situation. I mean I was over the top positive. Lost my keys? Great I’m getting some extra steps in looking for them? Struggling to pay the bills? I’m excited to look for a new better paying opportunity. That 2 week fling settled down with someone else? Awesome I can get back to focusing on my own self development and persue something lasting. Every choice we take has opportunity costs associated with it that we are choosing to lose out on. SO when life intervenes on our behalf thats one less choice we had to make to help us get to where we are meant to go on this great big journey of life.
Are you a complainer or have been one? How do you feel it effected your life? What steps have you taken to curb your complaints?